Do You Have a Relationship with God?

IT IS VERY common for people to say, “I believe in God.” This generic phrase is like saying, “I have a girlfriend” when asked if you are in a relationship.

However, do you have a healthy and intimate relationship? Are you even in a relationship or only think you are?

Let’s imagine a scenario where someone told you that they had a girlfriend that lived in another country. They had met 20 years ago. But they hadn’t been seen each other, much less been intimate in 15 years. That they only spoke to each other on the phone once or twice a year. And when they spoke, it was just for intervals of 5 min at a time. Would you say that person even has a relationship?

I’m inclined to think that most people would say: “Sorry to break it to you. But you HAD a girlfriend, and now what you have is an acquaintance you talk to occasionally.”

Now switch “girlfriend” with the word “God,” and you will quickly see whether you have a relationship with Him.

God Wants Total Intimacy with Us

Christianity is the greatest “Love Story” ever told:

God wants intimacy with us to the point where we unite with Him into a single essence, for us to become One in His Love.

This union is the type of relationship God wants to have with us, for us to become part of the Trinity, through Jesus Christ. Our unity with God is also the highest level of intimacy and exchange of Love anyone can ever obtain.

Receiving this gift is what Christianity is about: The Road showed to us by Jesus Christ, which allows us to obtain this level of relationship with God.

As such, the core of all Christian teaching is about how to begin and nurture your relationship with God. To show you how to advance along your Road until you become one with God.

How Healthy is Your Relationship?

Just like in any relationship, we can get caught up in the routine of everyday life, take people for granted, and forget to nurture our intimacy with that person. To assess whether we have a healthy relationship with God, we can use the ten questions below. Sometimes, it is easier to think about God in terms of a spouse. So I’ve included examples based on what a person might say about their spouse to use as a reference.

1. What is God to me in my life?

My spouse is my partner, the best part of my life, the better part of me. She has taught me what true love is by her gentleness and sacrifice. Her affection drives me to improve myself continually so I can give her the respect she deserves.

2. How much does God take part in your private life and of those close to you?

We live together and try to do as many activities together as we can. We have friends in common, and she loves everyone in my family, and they love her.

3. How often do you speak to each other about intimate personal subjects?

We try to go out and talk at least once a week for an hour.

4. How often do you make love, giving yourselves to each other in the act of union of the Eucharist?

We tend to make love at least once a week on Sundays and try to also be intimate during the week. We do this because we sincerely and intensely desire to enter into the act of union as frequently as we can.

5. How well do I know God?

I know everything about her, and she knows everything about me. We keep no secrets from each other.

6. How much do I trust in God?

I trust her with my life. I know that she will never betray me and always has my best interests in everything she does for my loved ones or me.

7. What good things has God given me?

She has given me two great children. She continually takes care of me and showers me with her love.

8. How often do I thank God for all the great things He does for my loved ones or me?

I thank her every day for all she does for me. I also try to make small tokens of appreciation as much as I can during the week. So I can remind her of my love for her.

9. Do you knowingly do things that displease or hurt God?

I am careful not to betray our intimacy or trust and avoid doing things I know my spouse dislikes. I would never intentionally hurt her emotionally or physically. Also, I would never cause her to suffer by mistreating the ones she loves, including myself.

10. Have you ever been unfaithful to Him? If so, are you still unfaithful, and how often?

I have never been unfaithful to her and would never knowingly sacrifice or hurt our relationship. Another answer might be: Unfortunately, I was unfaithful in my past, but I confessed to her, she has forgiven me, and we have since worked together to make our relationship more robust than it ever was. Now we have a loving relationship, and I would never knowingly betray the love we have for each other.

Strengthening Your Relationship

Once you have answered all the questions. Ask yourself:

What changes do I need to start to make in myself and in my life to become closer to God and have the type of relationship He wants to have with me?

Then, write down all the actions you would like to take and plan out how you will start carrying them out. For example: what kinds of gestures are you going to make to show your love? How often are you going to do them? Etc.

Please remember that God loves you, and no matter where your relationship with Him is, He is there waiting for you to come to Him. All you need to do is open your heart to Him and begin to have a loving, trusting, healthy relationship by carrying out the actions you wrote.

As you can see, answering these questions about our intimacy with God as if He were our spouse can give us some real insight into how healthy our relationship is. It will also help show weak areas that may need some attention to help strengthen your relationship. As a note, you could also use these questions to help you judge the health of any significant relationships in your life.

Finally, I recommend that you do this exercise at least once every three months, preferably once a month. Think of it as getting frequent checkups to see how healthy your relationship is. By doing so, I assure you that you will quickly begin to see improvements in your life and of those around you.